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You can’t imagine it, Jessie J states. There she was gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her current love, and finally the mother of a toddler after facing fertility challenges for a decade, riding high. Then in March she was found to have breast cancer.

The musician, real name Jess Cornish, is famous for being brutally honest. The record, the provocatively titled album, was intended as an candid account, dealing with every ounce of devastation she’d endured since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, losing a baby, broken romances, gaslighting, suicide) with her usual frankness. The initial release, her single No Secrets, was launched in the spring. But by then there remained a major undisclosed truth. The cancer. Later follow-up track, her song Living My Best Life, was released in May and she was talking to press about how she was thriving, while still secretly dealing with her cancer. Subsequently she went public, and in the start of summer she received surgical treatment.

She shoots me her best “Seriously?” glance. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘What’s happening?’ and I’m, like, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to call off performances because she’s still waiting for cosmetic procedures.

Our interview takes place at a photography studio in London. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, blue jeans with ornate white designs, off-white boots and large glasses. Picture rocker vibe meets 70s singer aesthetic. “It seems like I’m in the seventies and I should have a partner with a mustache.” Easy Rider, I say, recalling the film. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Cornish is quick, bold and filter-free. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is aiming for her first comedy performance in the coming year. “I love making people laugh. On stage I frequently joke about the audience.”

Health Struggles and Diagnosis

She was planning an appearance at the awards show when she noticed an abnormality. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an scan, and they said, ‘It seems benign; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I responded, ‘However, it’s there. I have arm pain and numbness in my fingers whenever I rise.’ And they suggested, ‘How about a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The physician told her if it was bad news she’d contact on the start of the week. By then the singer had persuaded herself it was fine. The way she explains it, it was simply too inconvenient to face illness when she had a busy schedule.

“We’re two weeks away from releasing the album after a long hiatus and no new music. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I thought, ‘Oh, it’s a Zoom, it won’t be anything.’ So I log in expecting it’s all going to be fine, and she goes, ‘You might want to sit.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your test results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I said, ‘That’s unfortunate. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”

Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness

She found the surgery terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. You’re escorted. You know when you have emergency surgery you are wheeled, but now I just marched with a gown on and my rear exposed. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she adds, she’s been lucky. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the op. “Cancer is awful, but however Thank fuck I found it early. The surgery happened four months ago and my affected breast now looks like a odd shape.” Another grin. “The nipple was preserved.”

The next operation is for health and appearance. Her breasts, she observes, are now “asymmetrical. The size doesn’t match. So inconsiderate! I reflected, no need to bully me, I’m already having a hard period. How offensive! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be ideal. My plans were disrupted.”

Past Medical Issues

Cornish is no stranger to illness. She feels her outlook on her diagnosis has been so optimistic because she’s experienced in health crises. They have often coincided with professional successes, functioning as a wake-up call, or blow, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘You having a good time? Hold on.’ Ever since I was a child, it has often paired with high points for me; something severe or obscure has happened to my health.”

She reminisces to her 11-year-old self, already starting her career featuring in the West End in Whistle Down the Wind (she was selected at the age of 9). That’s when she was found to have the heart condition WPW, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as lightheadedness and palpitations. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She skips forward six years, and young Jessica has entered the trio Soul Deep while enrolled in the academy. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a collision and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a year.”

Hey, I say, slow down, I can’t keep up. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees